( it's strange, still, to be counselling so many people from so many different worlds. it challenges his approach to mental health and the assumptions he's always held. it's a good thing, even if this wasn't exactly where he'd hoped to be in life by this point.
he hasn't touched the pain au chocolats on the side table masquerading as a coffee table between the two seating options, one leg crossed over the other as he looks over the paper on his clipboard, still mostly empty but for her name. )
So—
( he gives, more or less, the same explanation to every patient: this is a talking based therapy where she can talk about anything she wants. it doesn't have to be related to the reason she decided to come in the first place. if she wants to sit and talk about her favourite snacks for an hour, he's happy to do that. sometimes, he might give her "homework" — exercises he wants her to try and incorporate into her daily life — but that will be talked out as necessary. lastly, everything is confidential, there are enchantments on the windows that obscure people's view in and soundproof the yurt, and nothing will leave these four walls.
[Marianne listens to the explanation attentively, occasionally nodding to show that she understands. The idea of speaking about herself to an absolute stranger like this is still a bit of a strange one, even as she's already decided that it would be helpful for her.
The biggest hurdle at the moment, however, is that she has no idea where to begin. Dr. Maruki's open-ended approach doesn't make that decision any easier.]
Should I start by telling you about Fódlan? Or do you already know about it from one of the other people from Fódlan who are here?
( the start doesn't matter too much. sometimes the most telling sessions are the ones he's started talking about food or an anecdote from his home life. simple things to get people calm and settled.
but there's one thing she doesn't have to worry about; )
I've heard about it. ( well. lived through it, in a way, thanks to the Soul Pools. ) I take it you know Claude?
[It comes as a bit of relief that Marianne doesn't have to explain the whole of Fódlan to him. So many of her issues are closely tied to the world in which she grew up and lives, so it helps that he as an idea of it already. And in the topic of Claude, she has a starting point for this session.]
Yes, I do. He's was the House Leader for my house back at the Academy, and he's our commander in the war. I consider him to be a very dear friend, and he's done much to help me try to find peace with myself.
[After a pause, and a bit of hand wringing, she adds:]
It's, um, still a work in progress, but he's one of the ones who convinced me to start.
He's a good man. ( Maruki has always liked him since their first meeting. definitely someone suited to the leadership position he found himself in. (that, unfortunately, is something vanishingly rare back home. too many people who scheme and bootlick their way to positions of power.) ) I'm glad to hear you've a support system. That's very important in making steps towards recovery. Or, um, whatever your goal is.
( recovery. improvement. any sort of change is better bolstered with a support system. )
So, why don't we start by talking about what brought you here?
( a bold start, but he's hoping a "rip the band-aid" off approach will work here. )
[Marianne means that wholeheartedly. Claude's an unconventional leader, but he's been a perfect one to her. She'll follow him to the ends of the world, if he needs her to.
The direction question of why causes her to tense up immediately, her hands making small fists in her lap. Her first insinct, a thought that occurs to her before she even recognizes it as such, is to apologize for wasting Maruki's time and bolt. She fights that back--it defeats the entire purpose of everything leading up to this moment. He's here to help her, right?
That means she has to let him.]
I-I think "recovery" is the right word. [Marianne shifts in her seat, not able to look up at Maruki as she speaks.] You see, growing up and up until very recently I believed that I was doomed to a life of misery. I come from an ill-fated bloodline, and I have a Crest that's considered a curse to all who bear it. My... my father had the same crest, and my parents died because of it. There were people who blamed me for it. Said my Crest turned me into a beast and...
[Her voice breaks a bit, and she pauses to take a breath and steady herself. After a shake of the head, she continues--or, rather, picks up at a slightly different part of her story.]
At my worst, I wanted nothing more than to die. But thanks to Claude, and our professor, and all of the friends I've made, I've been able to confront the worst of it. We proved that I didn't turn into a beast and kill anyone, and I truly believe that I'm not nearly as cursed as I thought I was.
[At that, at least, she lifts her head and manages a small smile. It quickly fades, however.]
However, recently I find myself slipping back into old feelings. Some recent happenings here made me feel like the hopeless girl I used to be. And I'm worried about that.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
<3 mariiiii
Date: 2021-08-11 08:37 pm (UTC)( it's strange, still, to be counselling so many people from so many different worlds. it challenges his approach to mental health and the assumptions he's always held. it's a good thing, even if this wasn't exactly where he'd hoped to be in life by this point.
he hasn't touched the pain au chocolats on the side table masquerading as a coffee table between the two seating options, one leg crossed over the other as he looks over the paper on his clipboard, still mostly empty but for her name. )
So—
( he gives, more or less, the same explanation to every patient: this is a talking based therapy where she can talk about anything she wants. it doesn't have to be related to the reason she decided to come in the first place. if she wants to sit and talk about her favourite snacks for an hour, he's happy to do that. sometimes, he might give her "homework" — exercises he wants her to try and incorporate into her daily life — but that will be talked out as necessary. lastly, everything is confidential, there are enchantments on the windows that obscure people's view in and soundproof the yurt, and nothing will leave these four walls.
uh.
well. metaphorically speaking. )
♥ she's finally here!
Date: 2021-08-14 03:36 am (UTC)The biggest hurdle at the moment, however, is that she has no idea where to begin. Dr. Maruki's open-ended approach doesn't make that decision any easier.]
Should I start by telling you about Fódlan? Or do you already know about it from one of the other people from Fódlan who are here?
[Maybe she's not his first patient from home?]
cutest bean
Date: 2021-08-27 06:44 pm (UTC)but there's one thing she doesn't have to worry about; )
I've heard about it. ( well. lived through it, in a way, thanks to the Soul Pools. ) I take it you know Claude?
( who doesn't, really. )
no subject
Date: 2021-08-31 01:42 am (UTC)Yes, I do. He's was the House Leader for my house back at the Academy, and he's our commander in the war. I consider him to be a very dear friend, and he's done much to help me try to find peace with myself.
[After a pause, and a bit of hand wringing, she adds:]
It's, um, still a work in progress, but he's one of the ones who convinced me to start.
no subject
Date: 2021-09-11 04:41 pm (UTC)( recovery. improvement. any sort of change is better bolstered with a support system. )
So, why don't we start by talking about what brought you here?
( a bold start, but he's hoping a "rip the band-aid" off approach will work here. )
cw: brief mention of suicidal ideation
Date: 2021-09-11 11:35 pm (UTC)[Marianne means that wholeheartedly. Claude's an unconventional leader, but he's been a perfect one to her. She'll follow him to the ends of the world, if he needs her to.
The direction question of why causes her to tense up immediately, her hands making small fists in her lap. Her first insinct, a thought that occurs to her before she even recognizes it as such, is to apologize for wasting Maruki's time and bolt. She fights that back--it defeats the entire purpose of everything leading up to this moment. He's here to help her, right?
That means she has to let him.]
I-I think "recovery" is the right word. [Marianne shifts in her seat, not able to look up at Maruki as she speaks.] You see, growing up and up until very recently I believed that I was doomed to a life of misery. I come from an ill-fated bloodline, and I have a Crest that's considered a curse to all who bear it. My... my father had the same crest, and my parents died because of it. There were people who blamed me for it. Said my Crest turned me into a beast and...
[Her voice breaks a bit, and she pauses to take a breath and steady herself. After a shake of the head, she continues--or, rather, picks up at a slightly different part of her story.]
At my worst, I wanted nothing more than to die. But thanks to Claude, and our professor, and all of the friends I've made, I've been able to confront the worst of it. We proved that I didn't turn into a beast and kill anyone, and I truly believe that I'm not nearly as cursed as I thought I was.
[At that, at least, she lifts her head and manages a small smile. It quickly fades, however.]
However, recently I find myself slipping back into old feelings. Some recent happenings here made me feel like the hopeless girl I used to be. And I'm worried about that.